World’s Worst Excuse

Just watched an episode of World’s Wildest Police Videos.  Cops stop a car with 2 scummy characters in it.  They search the car and remove what amounts to a complete portable meth lab, with beakers, ether bottles, and all kinds of equipment.  Cops  put it all  on the hood in front of the dash cam, and ask one of the handcuffed felons what all that equipment is for.  The guy answers that he doesn’t know, that he bought the stuff  at an “antique store.”

Celtic Woman

I just watched the Celtic Woman special on our local educational TV channel.  Something about the group bothers me.  They will never be made up more elegantly  or be younger than they were on the special,  yet something  is still not right.  It is  as if their features were put together from leftover human  parts.  As I watched them I was reminded of the alien woman in the movie Mars Attacks who was invited into the White House by Martin Short,  then proceeds to kill everyone in sight.   The six women also have strange names.  Mairead plays a violin, has a pug nose,  and looks like a pixie.  Meav has a chin like an NFL lineman,  Orla (at first I thought it was “Orca”) has such high cheekbones they almost hide her eyes.  The only one who might be called attractive in the loosest sense is Hayley, who resembles (of all people) Chelsea Clinton.  Chloe sings like she thinks everyone is looking at her.  She bends over and really gets into it.  Lisa looks…well, there’s nothing really wrong with her looks, but nothing really right either.  She just looks like she is “there.”    They all have that strange look in their eyes that says “I am not an American like you.”  Had I been at a live concert it might have frightened me a little.  They opened with a great Celtic tribute to “Bonnie Prince Charlie” called Mo Ghile Mear, but the choreography looked like it was done by a high school music teacher who graduated near the bottom of the class at a mediocre school of education.  They turned the song into a boy-girl type love song, which is not was it was intended to be.  (If you want to hear a great version of the authentic Celtic tribute sung in the original language, Google “Mo Ghile Mear “and select the YouTube version sung by Cara Dillon and IarIa Olionaird at the Ryder Cup.)   Anyway,  I decided not to buy the DVD since I was afraid that watching it late at night might give me bad dreams.