Scrabble

I enjoy playing Scrabble on Wordbiz.com.  I even became a member since I play so much.  I am proud of my score, which of late has been over 900.  Unfortunately, I can find no one willing to share my joy at winning against worthy opponents.  Even members of my own family seem to “glaze over” when I describe a particularly close match.  My goal is to again reach 1000, but such a goal is difficult since if one beats a lower ranked opponent he (or she)  might get 5 or 10 points, but lose to that opponent and it costs 30 or more points.  (It’s a little bit like “Sissifous” for you Classical scholars out there.)  It’s fun to see how the spell checker reacts to “Sissifous.”  It suggested “insidious” or “sissified,” among other choices.  I prefer to play Scrabble on- line rather than against  “the Mrs.” because she won’t play with a timer, and spends an infinite amount of time studying her next move.  When we do play, I always try to have a book nearby, or a television (preferably high-definition) with a full cable or satellite package and sophisticated remote at hand.   I have also been known to nap between her moves.  I will have to say that she is an accomplished bridge player, however.  We play off and on at duplicate studios,  but bridge takes a lot of attention and mental energy, while Scrabble allows one’s mind to idle most of the time.  I always worry when I go to a bridge tournament, because some old codger either faints or falls, and causes pandemonium in the hall.  I had to pick up an old man one time at a tournament, who fell out of his chair while attempting to get up.   Speaking of old, I hate that television ad (I don’t know what they are selling) that shows an old woman playing Bingo, who seems happy since all her financial needs are met.  At the end of the ad she yells out “Bingo!”  Her obvious delight is the result of having purchased the advertiser’s services and having the winning card.

Santa Claus

While driving through our neighborhood the other day, I chanced upon an inflated Santa Claus in a neighbor’s yard  that had partially fallen over because of the relatively high winds.  Since Santa’s hands were in front of him he had fallen in such a way that he appeared to be doing pushups as the wind blew underneath him.  I felt particularly sorry for the small unidentified inflated animal underneath him.  I hope no children saw it.

Memorable Moments

Our son recalls the time he was in a 7-11 in Austin, and some high school students came in looking for the University.  One of them asked the clerk “Where’s Texas?”  One night we were going to the Addison Theatre, where there were two productions going on simultaneously in different parts of the Conference Center.  Since were were almost late and in a hurry, our companion asked someone outside “Which way is Oklahoma?”  The person looked puzzled, and I imagined that what he wanted to say was “About 100 miles north.”  Anyway, we finally found the production of Oklahoma  on our own without his help.  Our daughter remembers when she worked in an office, and a woman came in and asked “Are you gay?”  Later she found out that the woman was looking for a person working in the office named “Gay.”  I was amused reading on the Internet some advertising material for fiber tablets.  It said that when one starts taking the tablets, he or she might experience some digestive disturbances, and therefore should avoid “social situations” for the first few days.

A Little Joke from Dr. Thompson

Bill Thompson said one of his colleagues at UTD told him this, so I am saving it here for posterity.  Old man walking through forest sees a frog.  Frog says if man will kiss him the frog will turn into a beautiful woman, available to do his bidding, whatever lusty thing that may be.  Old man puts frog in pocket and walks on.  After a few minutes frog asks to be taken out of pocket, and asks man why he hasn’t kissed him yet.  Man says “I think I would prefer a talking frog.”

Real Chicken

I passed a KFC on Saturday with a sign in the window that said “Made with Real Chicken.”  That worries me.  Does it mean that up until now KFC was made with something other than real chicken?  After all,  we used to take our children there!  Do they mean that KFC was always made with real chicken?  If so, that’s not what the sign says.  I would also like to know what artificial chicken would be made from.  This seems like a case of poor advertising creating more questions and problems than it solves.  I never really questioned KFC before, but now I am on guard.  Should I ignore any of the outlets without a “real chicken” sign in the window?   Should I ask for the paperwork from any outlet I visit to confirm  that the source of all their poultry products is an “accredited” poultry farm?   Should I write to the  KFC home office for a list of all outlets not promising “real chicken”? Frankly I am scared, and need help with this.

Rio Caliente

Just got back from 10 days in “Old Mexico” at Rio Caliente Spa.  Spa was correctly described as “rustic” in Trip Advisor.  It was in the mountains about 45 minutes by taxi from Guadalajara.  The high point of the week was a Scrabble game when Kent (also known as “baby boy”) scored 110 points on his first play with Quahaug, an edible clam.  Unfortunately he had to use the Scrabble reference book to find the word, but I didn’t say anything.  Spa was noted as a bargain spa, and it was that.  One of the resident dogs, Preciosa,  spent the night in our room twice.  The operators of the spa said that she seeks out the “neediest” people and attaches herself to them for the duration of their stay.  She was a very polite little dog.  When she wanted to go out early in the morning, she would make a tiny little bark so as not to disturb anyone.  A lot of old ladies at the spa,  cellulite everywhere.  The vegetarian menu was pretty good overall.  We were amused that the labels identifying items on the buffet called bread crumbs “bread dust,” and a sign bragging about the Spa’s water filtration system claimed that the filters could eliminate e coli bacteria, since the bacteria are “too fat” to pass through the filters. Programs were “New Age” stuff like how to interpret Tarot Cards.  I could see that the presenter could use the  Tarot cards to make any interpretation she wanted.  For example,  if the Death card was drawn, it could be interpreted as the “death” of an old job, or even the death of an old habit.  I asked her during her question and answer session what would happen if she drew a new set of cards a few minutes after the initial drawing.  I wondered if the results would be totally different.  She seemed defensive, and said that she would not deal another set of cards after the first round.  Guess that settles that.  She advised one spa guest from England in a public reading that he should stay in Mexico for 2 years to find his “destiny.”  Another New Age thing was “BioResonance Therapy.”  You hold a copper tube, and the machine operator touches the other end of a wire to several bottles of different substances, like pesticides or other chemicals.  When you have a “hit” the little copper rod he is holding vibrates against a “gong,” which indicates the presence of the chemical. The theory is that chemicals have an electromagnetic “signature” which is unique to each chemical.  After identifying the chemical or chemicals present (mine included solvents and pesticides) he puts magnets on your chest for 10 minutes to “leach” the offending chemicals.  The next day  a footbath extracts the offenders from the body. Pretty wild stuff, but the treatment was included in the package, so I did it.